Joe (Samuel Wurzelbacher), please stop touring, writing, doing interviews, and basically ramming your bigoted, uneducated nonsense all over the media. I can’t believe anyone gives this guy the time of day anymore, but at least it’s fodder for serious *headdesk* and *facepalm* moments.

Check out what he says to Christianity Today in one of their little “timely” interviews to appear current. Too bad their version of  “current” is months too late.

On gay marriage:

I personally still think it’s wrong. People don’t understand the dictionary—it’s called queer. Queer means strange and unusual. It’s not like a slur, like you would call a white person a honky or something like that. You know, God is pretty explicit in what we’re supposed to do—what man and woman are for. Now, at the same time, we’re supposed to love everybody and accept people, and preach against the sins. I’ve had some friends that are actually homosexual. And, I mean, they know where I stand, and they know that I wouldn’t have them anywhere near my children. But at the same time, they’re people, and they’re going to do their thing. [emphasis added]

This whitewashed bigot really cracks me up. Read the two bold parts next to each other and explain to me how in the hell the actions in the latter fit the statement in the former. That’s right; they don’t. Typical.

Oh, and note how his interviewer Pulliam just skips from topic to topic without challenging him on any of his poisonous ignorance. Perhaps the interview had to be edited to avoid “controversy” or perhaps she didn’t find his drivel as offensive to the brain as most of the folks in the comments did. Or if we’re lucky, perhaps she secretly wanted him to hang himself with his terrible views dangling out in public like that. That actually worked.

On politics:

…I think that all needs to be taken out of the federal level and give it back to the states. We’ve lost our American history. Every state has “In God we trust” or “With God’s help” in their constitution. God is recognized as, if you will, America’s religion.

JTP seems to love the new US motto “In God We Trust” which was adopted in 1956. I suppose he wouldn’t support the historical motto, “E pluribus unum” (“from many, one”) since he’s all about the individual states and no central government to keep the unity for which we fought so hard in the Civil War. And I didn’t even mention the Deist Founding Fathers (not Christian).

I like Sarah Palin a lot, actually. I just don’t know if that’s where God’s leading her. I just know the Republican Party’s done its best to blackball her. I don’t know what her agenda is. If she ran, would I vote for her? Absolutely.

Meet the poster boy for voter ignorance. Follow JTP and you don’t even have to know what the candidate plans or stands for! No critical thinking–as easy as American Pie!

When politicians start talking about being a Christian, I just worry, because a lot of them don’t really follow through. I like to see real action in that area. … I would love to hear our leaders actually check with God before he does stuff.

Wait, wait. He wants them to check with God before God does stuff? Don’t move a finger, God! They need to check with you first!
But seriously, I’d rather they check with reliable resources and use their reasoning skills, experience, and education before making decisions, thanks. Talking to their imaginary friends aren’t what I call admirable qualities. I know, I know, it’s a freethought daydream.

Many of the comments are silly, hilarious, or simply bear repeating, so after the cut I’m going to quote some of my favorites.

Sad: “I know plenty of conservative gays I would trust with my children before I would with liberal straights.”

Clay: “Hi, does anyone know where I can find the publication ‘Unlicensed, Tax-cheating, Wife-beating, Attention-seeking, Idiotic Plumbing Today’? Oh, never mind, I found it.”

Alex Hancock: “This isn’t the bottom of the barrel, it’s the crud underneath the bottom. “People don’t understand the dictionary.” Do you actually believe you are contributing to any worthwhile discourse by having this empty-headed, heartless goon correct the rest of us on our understanding of the English language? You are as unworthy of respect as you seem to be incapable of shame.”

Indiana Dave: “Joe the unlicensed plumber must not have any time for those clogged DRAINS, since he has become so important to every and any issue he is asked about. He is in the right party though, with the GOP spinning down their DRAIN.”

mark h: “joe, don’t worry about your kids. most of us homos would much rather be with a real man like you — were it not for your potty mouth, of course (no pun intended).”

Darrell: “I am behind you Joe, most people are misinterpreting your comments. I don’t want them near my kids either, not because of the pedophile angle, but because of the example they set, our kids are under an onslaught of indoctrination on TV nowadays, watch MTV for one day to see it, the message pushed is that it is fashionable or cool to be gay, I am sorry but I believe it is a natural choice. I am all for equal rights but not outright indoctrination of impressionable kids. Which is what is happening today.”
[GG replies: I’m all for equal rights, but not outright indoctrination of impressionable kids. Which is what’s happening today in churches all over the world.]

Anonymous: “Keep talking Joe!! We love you. You make every secular loving American happy to be alive.”

Juke: “Most people don’t want gays around their children….its reality folks, not Hollywood.”

Ubu: “Well, I wouldn’t let this fraud near my plumbing, so I suppose we’re even…”

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6 thoughts on “Joe the Plumber’s 15 minutes and 59 seconds”

James Tracy · May 5, 2009 at 11:06 pm

He should stick to plumbing, although I am not even sure that he is good at that…

    godlessgirl · May 6, 2009 at 3:15 am

    He's just as certified a plumber as he is an intellectual politico.

James Tracy · May 5, 2009 at 11:06 pm

He should stick to plumbing, although I am not even sure that he is good at that…

    godlessgirl · May 6, 2009 at 3:15 am

    He's just as certified a plumber as he is an intellectual politico.

grimmlock · July 11, 2009 at 9:53 pm

responding to a 9 week old blog post = good, right?

anywho, i will never understand how people can call homosexuality a choice. all one has to do is look at nature and see how many species engage in intercourse with members of the same sex. of course, the people who don't see this are the same type who don't understand evolution and wonder why monkeys are not turning in to people (it is called a common ancestor folks, followed by divergent evolutionary paths, do a little research).

i do have to say one thing about what you said about the central government. the idea the founders had was for there to be numerous states that retained some autonomy to make decisions within their own state. this is essentially spelled out in the 10th amendment: "The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people."

while there was supposed to be a central government uniting the states under one rule, it was never supposed to become the overbearing tyrant that it has become, using such things as threatening to withhold money to the states if they do not follow its dictates.

basically, if the states had kept their balls and not allowed things to get to the point they are now, we could have had different areas devoted to different ideals. if you disagreed with the way your state was going, you had the option of going to one that agreed more with what you believed and joining like minded people (the closest i can come to a current version of this is the free state project).

enough of my inane political drivel, though, and my crazy minarchist ideas. homosexuality is not wrong, it is not a choice, but you don't have to like it. hell, as long as it is being done in public (meaning actual real public property, not a private business or a private residence) then you can even say whatever you want about it. that is your right as a person. the problem comes in when you try to impose your ideas on what is right or wrong on another individual based off of the ignorance that was spoon fed to you when you were a child by the religious morons out there.

i think i'm done now.

grimmlock · July 11, 2009 at 9:53 pm

responding to a 9 week old blog post = good, right?

anywho, i will never understand how people can call homosexuality a choice. all one has to do is look at nature and see how many species engage in intercourse with members of the same sex. of course, the people who don't see this are the same type who don't understand evolution and wonder why monkeys are not turning in to people (it is called a common ancestor folks, followed by divergent evolutionary paths, do a little research).

i do have to say one thing about what you said about the central government. the idea the founders had was for there to be numerous states that retained some autonomy to make decisions within their own state. this is essentially spelled out in the 10th amendment: "The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people."

while there was supposed to be a central government uniting the states under one rule, it was never supposed to become the overbearing tyrant that it has become, using such things as threatening to withhold money to the states if they do not follow its dictates.

basically, if the states had kept their balls and not allowed things to get to the point they are now, we could have had different areas devoted to different ideals. if you disagreed with the way your state was going, you had the option of going to one that agreed more with what you believed and joining like minded people (the closest i can come to a current version of this is the free state project).

enough of my inane political drivel, though, and my crazy minarchist ideas. homosexuality is not wrong, it is not a choice, but you don't have to like it. hell, as long as it is being done in public (meaning actual real public property, not a private business or a private residence) then you can even say whatever you want about it. that is your right as a person. the problem comes in when you try to impose your ideas on what is right or wrong on another individual based off of the ignorance that was spoon fed to you when you were a child by the religious morons out there.

i think i'm done now.

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