Comments on: Why I’m Childfree

By: SMW

SMW — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 02:40:49 +0000

It was a pleasure to read this piece — especially the even-handed manner in which you approach the subject. I’d like to add one more to the list that I often get (which in a strange way may actually be a compliment — maybe some people truly can’t gauge my age):

WELL-MEANING PERSON: So, do you have any children?

ME: (cordially) No.

WELL-MEANING PERSON: (lowers voice) Oh, well — it’s not too late.

ME: Well…yes, it is.

end

I’m almost six years into menopause (mine happened quite early on into my 40′s). It truly is too late! But I’m grateful that it is – I don’t miss having a period – and I’m so thankful I don’t have kids. Instead of the drama that I might be going through now with teenagers or if I’d had them later in life, five-or-six-year-olds — I enjoy the luxury of sleeping in on weekends and being able to do absolutely nothing if I choose. That is worth its weight in gold to me.

By: Anna Johnstone

Anna Johnstone — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 22:31:32 +0000

I thought that at 22 too. I was married but far too young to even consider that and I’m glad I didn’t because the man I was married to turned out to be an abusive control freak and I was able to escape him completely. I am now 30 and married to a real man and have 2 beautiful boys (2 and 24 wks). I never ruled it out bet nor was it my life’s goal. I hit 27 and sure enough I got clucky so decided WITH my husband that then was the right time for us.

It’s a big and permanent, but more importantly, a personal choice so while I also abjectly loathe the mothers and others who think that a woman is for having children and denigrate those women who have chosen not to, I also loathe the ‘childless by choice’ who act like not only is their choice the ONLY rational one (we’d pretty soon die out if we ALL though that way) but carp on about children and mothers being a plague on society or something vulgar and unsightly which should be kept out of sight: especially theirs.

It is entirely wrong to try to pressure another woman into making that decision especially as most of us are fighting so hard for a woman’s right to choose and to keep abortion legal and safe, I applaud Godless girl for her reasonable attitude and wish there were more like her in the world.

By: Savetheworldbecomeanatheist

Savetheworldbecomeanatheist — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 12:51:16 +0000

Thank you for publishing this excellent article, I am 22, and although do not know how I may feel regarding kids when i’m 30 I know my current thoughts and feelings, and you reflect them wonderfully!

By: rony

rony — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 15:05:25 +0000

I love the “when you meet the right man, you will want to have children” or ” what if you fall in love and get married, you won’t give your husband children?” NO I won’t I met the love of my life over a year ago and I don’t think I could love him more however he knows how I feel and respects it. If things were to change we both have the option of moving forward and won’t be connected by such an obligation. Futhermore, a person has to want children in order to be open to having them once they meet someone they want children with right? I am just feed up with the explaining myself because it’s not enough that I don’t want kids. I have to explain why, that’s BS because people are having childen they can’t feed or clothe and calling it a blessing. I don’t feel I am missing anything at all and would never have a child to please anyone or any man for that matter. I am upfront with men I date about not ever wanting children, so if that is not something that they can accept, then plenty women are more than willing.

By: Childless By Choice - Dina RunsDina Runs

Childless By Choice - Dina RunsDina Runs — Sun, 16 Oct 2011 13:38:32 +0000

[...] Why I’m Childfree .nrelate .nr_sponsored{ left:0px !important; } // This entry was posted in Life, Random and tagged Being over 30, Childfree, Childless, Sexism, Women by Dina. Bookmark the permalink. [...]

By: sabrina

sabrina — Fri, 14 Oct 2011 22:30:07 +0000

I agree too i don’t want kids either and i get asked why dont i want kids. Im just never had the urge to be a mom i love my freedom and being able to take a trip at random.

By: Alexandra

Alexandra — Tue, 11 Oct 2011 07:49:34 +0000

In my country, saying you don’t want kids is like throwing yourself off a cliff. People will give you disgusted looks. “What kind of woman doesn’t want kids, you make me sick”. And I live in eastern europe, not some country where stoning people is acceptable!

By: To Procreate or Not to Procreate: That is the Question | Clandestine Underground

Sat, 01 Oct 2011 21:20:09 +0000

[...] becoming less of a “taboo” subject. Here are a few articles I read on the matter: [ Why I'm Childfree ] [ Snappy Comebacks to Questions about Being Childfree ] [ Miss Out On Unconditional Love [...]

By: Byter

Byter — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 02:22:57 +0000

Oh I love you Godless girl for this article! I mean I absolutely adore children, but i seriously have no desire to have one of my own. And when i mention such thing in conversation with people – i have gotten looks of disgust, and have been told things like – ‘you are biologically programmed to have one’, ‘wtf? what kind of woman doesnt want children?’, and other things you mentioned. I am just happy as I am, what’s wrong with that?!! It is great to reproduce and add to the greater goodness, but I am adding to the greater goodness in a different way. True, we have the “equipment” to reproduce, but we also have this thing called choice in this day and age!

By: Patience

Patience — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 07:09:47 +0000

Wow, thank you so much for saying all this for me! When I was engaged (and even at the wedding reception) people were already asking about kids, and when I said we didn’t want any I got several replies straight off your list! I’m giving your list of no-no’s to some family and friends, to try to help them get it. I love kids, but I’d rather love someone else’s!