Donuts!

photo by See-ming Lee

Is church too touchy-feely for you? Are there too many songs? Are the talks too long and too boring? Do you need a donut break from all those women? How about a church service just for men?

What is Man Church? Man Church is church the way a man expects it to be done. No singing, short sermon, time to talk with other guys, no women present, and coffee and donuts. That’s the way men want to do church. The topics of discussion will have a definite manly focus – being the best possible husband, father, employee, leader – being a real man. In fact, every aspect of Man Church is geared for men – not like any other church you have seen. This ain’t your mama’s church!

These apes guys apparently can’t handle creative expression, women, music, or big words. If I were male, I’d be insulted that my church leadership thinks I am an emotionless, simple-minded grunt who doesn’t crave depth of study and a song once in a while. This sounds  fast food instead of a full course meal.

Notice how all of the selling points for “Man Church” exclude anything that appears remotely homosexual. No surprise, coming from a Christian church, but it still blatantly ignores men who don’t fit into this grunting, emotionless, impatient mold. Machismo is one of my hot-button issues, and “Man Church” really grinds my nerves.

I think we need to watch a little Tim Allen to understand these “manly men”:

Home Improvement never gets old to me :D.

Related Posts with Thumbnails

32 thoughts on “Man Church!”

Nikki · December 11, 2010 at 11:50 pm

Machismo aside, that sounds like a much better version of church to me. The singing always seemed kinda silly and the long sermons boring. Not that I’ve ever actually been to church so I’m not much of a judge, but hey, coffee and doughnuts! 🙂

greateighthsin · December 12, 2010 at 3:32 am

Yes, can someone define what a “man” really is? Is it that burly lumberjack? That plumber? “Mr. tall, dark, and handsome”? That fat lout that does nothing but watch NFL all day? How about that man-whore that’s seen more action than any couple’s bedroom? What about that dude down the street that plays the guitar? What about your video gamer guy? How about that guy that would rather sit alone and enjoy life? What about that painter that is a poet with a brush? What about that guy that takes even the greatest of social risks and dresses in a dress simply because it makes him happy? Aren’t these men, too?

Now, can someone define what a “woman” really is……..?

Gender does exist, but at it’s core, it is very vague. It’s a combination of society and ourselves that divides it, labels it, then shapes it. The church can’t figure this one out. They’re too far stuck in between times of modern society, and sheep herder ideologies. This is why many of them can’t distinguish the fact that your gender has absolutely nothing to do with your sexuality. If it did, then homosexuality would not exist. But, that would be using logic, and that seems in short supply when it comes down to the hardcore religious who preach against homosexuality and use and abuse it’s incorrect stereotypes.

    Henway · December 16, 2010 at 11:14 pm

    I think the differences all stem from the biological sexual differences. Thus a woman should be gentle, compassionate, playful, etc, while a man should strive for stoicity, ambition, humor, and courage. It’s just basic yin and yang. Women don’t find soft and gentle attractive at all, the same way men don’t find ambitious women with hardness attractive.

      Amanda · December 18, 2010 at 2:22 pm

      Actually there is little to no biological basis for the differences you described. Women can be stoic (and often are, I know no one more stoic than my own mother actually), and men can be gentle. If my fiance was not gentle, kind, and compassionate I would never have been attracted to him in the first place. Of course he has struggled with his personality as it contradicts what people like you seem to believe he *should* be (see your description of what men should “strive for”).
      These ‘differences’ come about due to society’s expectations of men and women, which are instilled in us from birth. So what seems to be a natural difference was never really there from the beginning; we created it all.
      However, if you have any peer reviewed studies which suggest that “yin and yang” is a legitimate theory which explains differences between gender roles more succinctly than societal expectation, I would be open to that.

David L · December 12, 2010 at 6:13 am

Man church isn’t any worse than any other church. They are breeding grounds for prejudice and bigotry. I think we should tolerate them but not encourage them.

DeoVacuus · December 12, 2010 at 6:43 am

No women?? I always thought the only good reason to go was the women! The singing and boring sermons I could do without though.

The "Eh"theist · December 12, 2010 at 12:02 pm

Personally, I read the description and thought it was awesome. Not because I would want to go there, but because of what it didn’t contain: no dogma, no threats of eternal damnation, no we’re right and everyone else is wrong, and not even a mention of god. It’s all about bonding with like-minded people in an enjoyable atmosphere.

It is demonstrating the desperate lengths that ministers are going to in order to hold onto their meal tickets-they’re hoping to get men in with coffeee and donuts and get them infected with “you need us or you’ll burn” before they realize they can bond around other activities and leave.

Churches are abandoning their “higher ground” in an attempt to keep bums in seats and money in the collection. From here, it’s a short hop to helping people realize that an experience of the transcendent is possible (as described by Hitchens and others) without clerical mediation and to realize that putting $20 in the plate for mediocre coffee and a podcast of the sermon doesn’t compare to groups organized around subjects that people are truly passionate about-that’s why meetups have been such a benefit to freethinkers and skeptics.

The best way to speed this up is to provide secular groups, with community, built around common interests and activities. Like the major networks in a 500-channel universe, church will become less and less of an influence as more alternatives appear.

Ahab · December 12, 2010 at 12:05 pm

I find the whole idea insulting to men. The idea that all men are macho, get-down-to-business lugs is false, plain and simple. Men are more different than we are alike, which this church fails to realize.

To boot, religious gatherings are supposed to be about community, but how can you have authentic community when you define your church by who it EXCLUDES?

    Ani Sharmin · December 18, 2010 at 12:23 pm

    “I find the whole idea insulting to men.”

    I agree. It always annoys me when people assume that all men have to be one way and all women have to be one way, with no allowances for people being themselves.

Ben Finney · December 12, 2010 at 9:52 pm

This might be old news to many here, but the TEDx Women conference had a splendid talk from Tony Porter, an activist against misogynistic indoctrination like this.

Jacob · December 13, 2010 at 3:57 am

I think someone just took the idea of a men’s bible study a little too far. This would not be a healthy church to attend, I’m going to guess.

The idea of gender grouping for any bible study is typically more that you aren’t going to discuss sexual temptation or get in a good cry or breakdown with someone else’s wife or husband, but rather with a friend of the same gender. Past that, regardless of the why’s and the should’s and the should not’s, men and women do typically connect on different levels in different ways. Again, nature or nurture aside, it is what it is.

Thanks for sharing that concept though. I think it’s well-intentioned church but rashly considered. I see marital problems arising out of this. Also, I’m with DeoVacuus in so far as the lack of women. I don’t go to get my mack on but I don’t want to spend every Sunday with hundreds of dudes only either. Plus on that glorious day when I get married, haha, what the heck’s my wife supposed to do every Sunday?!

    Three Ninjas · December 13, 2010 at 12:53 pm

    “Past that, regardless of the why’s and the should’s and the should not’s, men and women do typically connect on different levels in different ways.”

    I’ve always thought this was bullshit, and I always had a problem with this ubiquitous idea in every church I’ve ever attended. Different human beings connect on different levels in different ways. It’s not a gender thing.

      Jacob · December 13, 2010 at 10:15 pm

      Fair enough. But one of the why’s I ignored originally was that because of gender roles in culture, people get taught to connect differently or on different topics. I get you though, a human brain works how it works regardless of gender with the exception of some hormone input.

nullefide · December 13, 2010 at 12:23 pm

Is it just me or does that donut seem to be making that man WAY too happy? 😡

And I will never stop finding men who think everything that isn’t powered by an extension cord or that doesn’t explode is too frightening to handle and yet this fact somehow makes them THE BEST THING ON EARTH SINCE SLICED BREAD (that has been sliced with a chainsaw). Seriously, singing is just too much for them? Singing?

Totally the biggest wimps I have ever heard of. Just saying.

Three Ninjas · December 13, 2010 at 12:56 pm

I find this pretty offensive! I have practically nothing Manly ™ about me. I’m pretty much the opposite of this stereotype, and even when I was a full blown fundie, I would have hated this idea. I always hated the version of maleness that was portrayed in practically every church I attended. It didn’t apply to me at all. I really don’t want to talk to you about sports or hunting or whatever else you have to do to remind yourself that you’re not gay.

I also love the implicit claim that being an employer and a leader is for men only.

    Godless Girl · December 13, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    I also love the implicit claim that being an employer and a leader is for men only.

    That’s bloody right, that is.

Don · December 13, 2010 at 4:01 pm

No interest in religion, no interest in hanging out with manly-men. And how they expect to get decent baked goods with no women in attendance, is beyond me. So no man-church for me.

But if it keeps them occupied, instead of hunting deer on my land, works for me.

The Shy Atheist · December 15, 2010 at 9:46 am

I took a look at the website and saw nothing similar for women, which I find interesting. At the church I grew up in, there were programs like this plus one for the ladies. You know, to teach us how to be submissive and what-not.

On one hand, I feel a little ‘whatever’ about it. On the other hand (and mostly) it turns my stomach.

    Godless Girl · December 15, 2010 at 2:12 pm

    Speaking as a former Christian, the pigeon-holing and separation of the sexes seems like a plan that could easily foster division, isolation, and sexism. As a believer, I was a fan of the “family” and “body of Christ” emphasis taught in religious communities. Don’t separate people based on assumptions, expectations, or stereotypes. Unite them and the world becomes a better place.

Jacob · December 16, 2010 at 12:16 am

We need a new post. That picture of that guy creeps me out. It looks likes he’s enjoying that donut a bit too much.

TheSecretAtheist · December 17, 2010 at 2:35 am

I’m not sure if this is the same one I saw a few years back or another, but I saw something like this when I was still (mostly) a believer (well, when I was fooling myself into believing). It does insult me. Anything that asserts that a man is supposed to be one way and a woman another insults me. Sexist commercials also insult and piss me off.

Back then I wondered how anyone could be a believer and yet feel that terribly misogynistic. Now I look at religion and wonder why there isn’t more of this sort of thing based on the things the Bible teaches.

Larry · December 18, 2010 at 12:03 pm

I dunno… a church full of men… sounds kinda gay to me.

polokidsoutlet · September 22, 2011 at 10:42 am

The following amazing websites could be sweet!

dell inspiron 17r review · January 26, 2012 at 2:03 am

I am really impressed with your writing skills and also with the layout on your blog. Is this a paid theme or did you modify it yourself? Anyway keep up the excellent quality writing, it¡¯s rare to see a nice blog like this one today..

parçakontör · December 10, 2012 at 5:25 am

PARÇAKONTÖR HİZMETLERİ ;
Parçakontör Merkezi olarak neden Eylultelekom u tercih etmeliyiz.?
Eylül Telekom olarak siz değerli bayilerimizle birebir ilişkilerimizi , diyaloglarmızı güven maddesine dayalı olarak Türkiye\’nin her yerinde büyük bir ortaklık kurma çabası içindeyiz.Sistemiz içerisinde operatörlere bağlı olarak oluşabilecek bir sorunda tüm bayilerimize konu hakkında anlık bilgi verilir, gerekli görmesi durumda telefon ile iletişim kurularak sistem hakkında detaylı açıklamalar yapılmaktadır.Sorunsuz ve hızlı bir sistemi sistemini hizmetine sunan Eylül Telekom; Türkiye genelindeki bayileriyle, ve gönderimlerine ek olarak kazı konuş kartı hizmetinde bulunmaktadır. Adrese gitmek için Tıklayın

Bruce Pastor, Jr. · October 22, 2014 at 11:36 am

I was going through what I can find of me on the internet and I found this. Sorry for being a jerk. I am doing much better at being cordial now.

I still disagree with you, but I didn’t read the article again. I figure it is not important.

I hope life goes well for you.

    Godless Girl · November 12, 2014 at 3:03 pm

    Thanks for your honesty and apology. I admire that so much! I will delete your old comment for you.

Akinoshicage · April 12, 2016 at 1:22 pm

The original church growth strategy still works today. Learn why an investment in men  pays huge dividends in the local church.

Tweets that mention Man Church! | Godless Girl -- Topsy.com · December 12, 2010 at 12:33 am

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by GodlessGirl and GodlessGirl, Reverend Evolution. Reverend Evolution said: Man Church!: photo by See-ming LeeIs church too touchy-feely for you? Are there too many songs? Are the talks to… http://bit.ly/gfaych […]

Manly Man Stuff for Guys and Dudes and Burly Blokes | Godless Girl · August 30, 2011 at 11:02 am

[…] Manly Man Stuff for Guys and Dudes and Burly Blokes Cufon.refresh(); For all you fans of Man Church, there’s another church joining in on the machismo craze. If you want to grunt and cheer and […]

Leave a Reply

Related Posts

Christianity

Let’s Give It Up for the WTF

I love that somewhere out there in the world lives a person who uses precious minutes of their day to comment on reviews of Snow White and the Huntsman like this: THANK YOU TO THE USA. Read more…

personal

That’s Not Okay, Cupid: Online Dating Seduction Fails

One of the ways I’ve worked to increase my confidence while also having fun is dating casually. And nothing makes this experiment more like a good game of Russian Roulette than finding possible romantic interests Read more…

funny

Battlestar Galactica Gets It Right

Newsyflashy! I finally got WordPress working again, so I can finally update this damn thing. Let’s get started with a quickie (because I know you love those, baby). I am so late to the game, Read more…