Jesus texted the King James Bible? Wow, those are some powerful thumbs. I wonder if God uses autocorrect. I guess he didn’t care how much it would cost me to read it all. Verizon really over-charges, even for deities. It also reminds me of this guy:

By the way, if Jesus created deep dish pizza, couldn’t he have made it more healthy? It goes straight to my fat ass.

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13 thoughts on “Have a Little Text with Jesus”

The "Eh"theist · February 21, 2011 at 4:30 pm

*yuck* I could feel the syrup dripping off that christian’s post-why can’t christians appreciate things for what they are and the tangible benefits they provide rather than spiritualizing everything-I blame Augustine and Origen. Communication is great for staying in touch, learning, overthrowing dictators, humour, showing people you care-all great things in themselves.

My current personal annoyance is christians who say jesus must be on twitter because they follow him. If I had a nickel… *rollseyes*

The fact that god also created Sir-Mix-A-Lot might provide an answer to your last question.

*flees the thread while dodging pizza pans*

    Godless Girl · February 25, 2011 at 9:31 am

    I honestly can’t blame believers for being enamored with the concepts they teach, but I agree that sappiness and devotional-style talk is just annoying.

Andrew Hall · February 21, 2011 at 5:51 pm

See, if I were to say that Superman and I talk everyday I’d be locked up. There is no justice in the world. I’m going to bring that up with Superman tomorrow.

TheSecretAtheist · March 1, 2011 at 9:32 pm

I think Jesus went just a LITTLE over the 160 character limit. But then, he IS a magic man.

Ben Bradley · March 5, 2011 at 10:52 pm

So Jesus “texted” the whole Bible 2,000 YEARS AGO, before any human began writing down (and rewriting, editing, translating, deleting, rewriting, translating,…) anything for the New Testament? I’m constantly amazed at how much and how often faith trumps simple, obvious logic.

Hiroko · November 22, 2015 at 3:28 am

Mad AsthmaticAnd there was me thinking I had the grteeast (and worst) christmas song collection. Mine have been playing since the 1st of December and i will continue to torture my family with my many cds until the 12th night when I reluctantly have to put my collection away for another 12 months.As to the eastern europeans well they just have good taste in christmas music and of course the desire to get their hands on anything from the west.MA

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