Archive for ‘surveys and lists’

July 18th, 2009

Love Questionnaire

Image © Mike Stimpson

Image © Mike Stimpson

I feel especially high on love this weekend, so I wanted to ask you folks for your perspectives and stories on the subject. Feel free to answer these on your blog or in the comments below.

  • When was one time you felt truly loved?
  • Can you love someone without liking them?
  • What’s your favorite love song?
  • One of my friends became an atheist last year and stopped believing love existed. What’s your reaction to this?
  • What’s your favorite way to receive love? How about showing/giving love?
  • Do you think there are different kinds of love? (ie. romantic, friendship, love for things, loving your pets,  familial)
  • What’s one of the oddest or stupidest things you’ve done for love?
  • Can love be quantified? (eg. “I love you more than my ____” or “I love her more now than ever.”)
  • Is love an emotion or an action (or something else altogether)? Can they be mutually exclusive?
  • Is it possible to love without conditions? i.e. No matter what someone does, feels, is, or could possibly be, you’ll love them.
  • Is is better to have love and lost than to never have loved at all?
  • It is said that sacrificing your life for another’s is the highest form of love. What do you think?
  • When does infatuation turn into love?

Categoryquestions, randomness, relationships, surveys and lists | Comment8 Comments »

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June 17th, 2009

Tweeps Speak: Open Relationships

Adapted from airgap on flickr
For one year I was romantically entangled with a polyamorous man. He explained that he and his partner had agreed to have an open relationship where each person could love and enjoy other people sexually as long as they always stayed completely honest, practiced safe sex, took care of all each other’s emotional, physical, and practical needs first, and felt secure together–not jealous or afraid of losing one another. There was an underlying commitment that went along with their willingness to “spread the love” and explore other sexual avenues.

I soon learned that he and his partner were quite the normal couple with problems, insecurities, and hard work. Our experience ended up showing me that I was not inclined to take part in a polyamorous relationship, especially as “the other woman”. I was too selfish, insecure, and I treasured exclusivity too much to be prepared for that type of experience. I did not feel secure, trusting, nor loved. Perhaps this was his fault; perhaps it was the situation. Maybe it was me!

And although it did not work out, the relationship caused me to wonder: If we’re perfectly healthy emotionally and mentally, are we more inclined to be monogamous or to have multiple love partners? Does it depend on the individual? What is the reason for jealousy and the desire for security? What makes us cheat? Could having an open relationship help a couple? Or does it harm them in the long run? Is it only about sex?

Survey says..!

I recently polled my Twitter pals about the titillating topic of open relationships. Keep in mind that most of my tweeps are non-religious folks from all walks of life. If you’d like to respond, please comment! I’m fascinated by the variety of opinions and research on this topic.

Let’s see what they had to say using 140 characters! I’m keeping things anonymous to conserve their privacy.

Part A: “What do you think about open relationships?”

They’re ok, if you can handle that sort of thing. don’t think I could though.

I think whatever people can make work for them relationship-wise is fine by me, I’ve seen open relationships work out fine. [cont.] I think in a way Open Relat. may be easier, as there r far less boundaries 2 worry about crossing, no fear of being cheated on.

Not for me. [x2]

Whatever works for two (or three, or four…) consenting adults is none of my business whatsoever!

I like them! :) I think they’re much more realistic than what you’re told to expect, relationship-wise.

Not a big fan, but my ex-wife was a fan.

Read more and check out Part B on Monogamy vs. Polyamory below the cut!
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Categorymy past, questions, relationships, surveys and lists | Comment11 Comments »

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April 23rd, 2009

Stone Me

If I was living under Mosaic law today, here are the offenses for which I would be put to death:

Cursing Parents
For every one that curseth his father or his mother shall be surely put to death: he hath cursed his father or his mother; his blood shall be upon him. Leviticus 20:9 [show] For anyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death; he has cursed his father or his mother; his blood is upon him. (ESV)
This text is from the ESV Bible. Visit www.esv.org to learn about the ESV.

– What can I say? I’ve been angry at them before.

Working on the Sabbath
Whosoever doeth any work in the Sabbath day, he shall surely be put to death. Exodus 31:15 [show] Six days shall work be done, but the seventh day is a Sabbath of solemn rest, holy to the LORD. Whoever does any work on the Sabbath day shall be put to death. (ESV)
This text is from the ESV Bible. Visit www.esv.org to learn about the ESV.

– I’m pretty sure I’ve played Pick-Up-Sticks on the Sabbath before ;)

Premarital Sex (girls only)
. . . If, however, this charge is true, that evidence of the young woman’s virginity was not found, then they shall bring the young woman out to the entrance of her father’s house and the men of her town shall stone her to death, Deuteronomy 22:20 [show] But if the thing is true, that evidence of virginity was not found in the young woman, (ESV)
This text is from the ESV Bible. Visit www.esv.org to learn about the ESV.

– What if I get hymen replacement surgery so nobody will know? Oooh, sneaky.

Worshipping any god but Yahweh
If there be found among you, within any of thy gates which the LORD thy God giveth thee, man or woman, that . . . hath gone and served other gods, and worshiped them, either the sun, or moon, or any of the host of heaven, which I have not commanded; . . .Then shalt thou bring forth that man or that woman, which have committed that wicked thing, unto thy gates, even that man or that woman, and shalt stone them with stones, till they die. Deuteronomy 17:2-5 [show] "If there is found among you, within any of your towns that the LORD your God is giving you, a man or woman who does what is evil in the sight of the LORD your God, in transgressing his covenant, and has gone and served other gods and worshiped them, or the sun or the moon or any of the host of heaven, which I have forbidden, and it is told you and you hear of it, then you shall inquire diligently, and if it is true and certain that such an abomination has been done in Israel, then you shall bring out to your gates that man or woman who has done this evil thing, and you shall stone that man or woman to death with stones. (ESV)
This text is from the ESV Bible. Visit www.esv.org to learn about the ESV.

– Atheists are totally immune to this. Godless heathens FTW!

Girls who are Raped within the City Limits
If there is a girl who is a virgin engaged to a man, and another man finds her in the city and lies with her, then you shall bring them both out to the gate of that city and you shall stone them to death; the girl, because she did not cry out in the city . . . But if in the field the man finds the girl who is engaged, and the man forces her and lies with her, then only the man who lies with her shall die. Deuteronomy 22:23-25 [show] "If there is a betrothed virgin, and a man meets her in the city and lies with her, then you shall bring them both out to the gate of that city, and you shall stone them to death with stones, the young woman because she did not cry for help though she was in the city, and the man because he violated his neighbor's wife. So you shall purge the evil from your midst. "But if in the open country a man meets a young woman who is betrothed, and the man seizes her and lies with her, then only the man who lay with her shall die. (ESV)
This text is from the ESV Bible. Visit www.esv.org to learn about the ESV.

– On a serious note, I was date raped when I was 18. I wasn’t engaged to be married, but I didn’t cry out for help. Does this mean I would be put to death?

Blasphemers
And he that blasphemeth the name of the LORD, he shall surely be put to death, and all the congregation shall certainly stone him: as well the stranger, as he that is born in the land, when he blasphemeth the name of the Lord, shall be put to death. Leviticus 24:16 [show] Whoever blasphemes the name of the LORD shall surely be put to death. All the congregation shall stone him. The sojourner as well as the native, when he blasphemes the Name, shall be put to death. (ESV)
This text is from the ESV Bible. Visit www.esv.org to learn about the ESV.

– Oh come on, duh. I’m totally irreverent these days.

Anyone Who Tries to Deconvert Yahweh Worshipers
If anyone secretly entices you–even if it is your brother, your father’s son or your mother’s son, or your own son or daughter, or the wife you embrace, or your most intimate friend–saying, “Let us go worship other gods,” . . . you shall surely kill them; your own hand shall be first against them to execute them. Deuteronomy 12:6 [show] and there you shall bring your burnt offerings and your sacrifices, your tithes and the contribution that you present, your vow offerings, your freewill offerings, and the firstborn of your herd and of your flock. (ESV)
This text is from the ESV Bible. Visit www.esv.org to learn about the ESV.

– Does it count if I just try to make them think? Another win for Godless Heathens!

Check out Debunking Christianity for a list of offenses (from which i stole these references) for which you might be stoned. It’s like a sick game of BINGO.

Categorypersonal, surveys and lists, the bible | Comment2 Comments »

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February 26th, 2009

Don’t Silence the Christians

bullhorn250w
A friend informed me that a cable station near our alma mater was going to run a program called Speechless: Silencing the Christians, an anti-homosexuality, fundamentalist propaganda piece sponsored by the American Family Association (which might as well be called the Apple Pie and Cuddles Association to emphasize the warm fuzzies they use to hide the noose hanging from the nearest tree). Whoops, did I say that?

The network in question pulled the program after an avalanche of protests by LGBT supporters. At first, my reaction was elation. I clicked my heels,  seeing one more poisonous influence kept from the eyes and ears of thousands. Such vile propaganda shouldn’t be allowed on television!… right? Upon further introspection, I reassessed my glee. I was a hypocrite. Censorship only proves the point of the AFA–we did silence the Christians.

I believe in free speech for all, no matter how bigoted one’s beliefs. I may hate that you think what you do, but I want you to have the right to shout it from the rooftops–or preach it from the television–if it doesn’t infringe on the rights of others or break any laws. The freedom to speak your mind is the same freedom that lets me speak mine. Let the ideas stand freely on their own. The weak ones will fall where they may. To borrow a phrase: let the best idea win.

On the website for Speechless, you can watch the piece and then answer a survey they plan to send to top media, political, and social leaders in the United States. Inspired by Calladus, I’ve decided to answer this survey after the cut.

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Categorychristianity, homosexuality, politics, surveys and lists | Comment4 Comments »

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