A little while ago I stumbled on a blog post about how some Christians tend respond to the doubts of their fellow believers and how that may actually be pushing doubters away.
My [the author's] students say they encounter both reactions. One teen who is struggling to decide what she believes is discouraged because her parents’ primary response is, “Why can’t you just have faith, like we do?”
Another teen who is exploring alternative worldviews says his parents’ response is to denounce them: “You can’t prove that! You have no evidence.” As he tells me, “I need my parents to think ideas through with me, not just judge them.”
When parents and leaders react to questions by shaming or blaming, they may well drive their teens away. Both of my students have recently announced that they no longer consider themselves Christians.
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Fuller Theological Seminary recently conducted a study on teenagers who become leavers in college. The researchers uncovered the single most significant factor in whether young people stand firm in their Christian convictions or leave them behind. And it’s not what most of us might expect.
Join a campus ministry group? A Bible study? Important though those things are, the most decisive factor is whether students had a safe place to work through their doubts and questions before leaving home.
The researchers concluded, “The more college students felt that they had the opportunity to express their doubt while they were in high school, the higher [their] levels of faith maturity and spiritual maturity.”
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A 2009 study in Britain found that non-religious parents have a near 100 percent chance of passing on their views to their children, whereas religious parents have only about a 50 / 50 chance of passing on their views.
Clearly, teaching young people to engage critically with secular worldviews is no longer an option. It is a necessary survival skill.
Even though it sounded encouraging and pro-critical thinking, I felt it necessary to respond with a former Christian’s point of view:
The expectation that seems to have been left out of this post is that while believers should encourage honesty and critical examination, the only acceptable and “right” conclusion must be to re-affirm one’s faith and choose Christianity.
But what if the doubter has the courage to say “I’ve examined the evidence, prayed, searched, and discussed my doubts. The only reasonable conclusion I have come to is that Christianity is false.”
Will these parents, teachers, and pastors still encourage and support the reasoning and thorough examination of the faith when it leads to someone choosing something other than Christianity? Or does the support stop there because the desired outcome wasn’t achieved? Let’s be honest; believers only want someone to embrace doubt just long enough to come back to Jesus. Any other result is considered unacceptable and wrong.
What do you think about my take on it?
Some of the other replies made me chuckle:
… But Biblical faith is not irrational; it is based on reason: God did something and because of that we can believe he will do something else. That is reasonable. God said “Come, let us reason together.” And he often used reason to convince people. And he offered miracles as evidence. We need to realize that reason is the most wonderful gift that God gave mankind and use it. –Roger McKinney
… For you guys who need a scientific opinion on Scripture, check ANSWERS IN GENESIS. Pay a visit to their museum in Kentucky; get the books and videos. It is fascinating! –SF
In my past life, the only causes worth dying for were one’s faith and one’s country. I remember attending a youth conference where a provocative speaker spent an hour telling heart-wrenching stories about Christian persecution around the world and how many believers go to their deaths because they refuse to give in to those who do not give them religious freedom. These stories had a great impact on me at the time. I once considered going on a bible smuggling mission trip to China so I could help people who had to be underground and hidden in order to practice Christianity.
Martyrdom is revered in Christianity very highly, and it’s not hard to find a believer who will say they would gladly die for the cause of Christ. Willingness to die for one’s beliefs is considered an honorable act by most every religion I can think of. Even secular causes (especially in times of political upheaval) can bring about this drastic act of devotion.
I do not think martyrdom—whether modern or throughout history—proves anything about the claims these people made or the beliefs they held. More death does not equal more truth. I do not think that the more one suffers for those claims, the more glorious and righteous one is.
Read the Rest! Post a comment (9)Any deity that refuses evidence honors the intellectually dishonest, the ignorant, and the gullible.
… Or this deity is totally hands-off and doesn’t give a shit, which basically means we don’t need to give a shit either.
… Or this deity doesn’t exist.
Choices, choices.
I attended the screening for “The Nature of Existence” tonight. Since I blogged about the film last week, I wanted to follow up with my thoughts and reactions.
Director Roger Nygard interviewed over 100 people of different nationalities and beliefs. I heard the views of scientists in the same minute as Jainists, Native Americans, and New Age gurus.
Everyone answered the same 85 questions. Much of the insight I’ve heard or read before, but the most striking part of this documentary was the cacophony of thought and theory made up by all of these radically diverse groups. At first, It just felt like a mess of totally unrelated beliefs. I laughed quite a bit–both at the absurdly delusional and the fabulously comedic. Not until the very end when I had a time to reflect did I see the larger point.
It may seem simplistic, but I came away from The Nature of Existence with a renewed compassion for spiritual and religious people. My curiosity about world religions and the individuals that follow them has ballooned once again. Becoming an atheist may have brought a new realization that religion is based on delusion and unnecessary, but hearing people of all different philosophies ponder why we exist and what it means to live a good life just makes me want to be kinder and more open to those who are on the same journey as I am. The difference between us is which path we choose to get there.
There may be a larger truth, but no one religion has it. Even science doesn’t fully understand yet. We search for meaning because it’s part of our natures. Let’s just be kind to one another along the way, ok?
P.S. Go see the movie! Support independent film makers!


