How could I forget to honor the fantastically fallacious Fundies? Check out these snippets from what I consider an award-winning representation of monumentally stupid anti-evolution hogwash.

If, as evolutionists claim, all of mankind evolved from the SAME primitive life-source, then how did we end up with 7,000 different languages? The Bible teaches that God created all the different languages at Babel… “Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech … Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the LORD did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the LORD scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth” [see Genesis 11:1-9 [show] Now the whole earth had one language and the same words. And as people migrated from the east, they found a plain in the land of Shinar and settled there. And they said to one another, "Come, let us make bricks, and burn them thoroughly." And they had brick for stone, and bitumen for mortar. Then they said, "Come, let us build ourselves a city and a tower with its top in the heavens, and let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be dispersed over the face of the whole earth." And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of man had built. And the LORD said, "Behold, they are one people, and they have all one language, and this is only the beginning of what they will do. And nothing that they propose to do will now be impossible for them. Come, let us go down and there confuse their language, so that they may not understand one another's speech." So the LORD dispersed them from there over the face of all the earth, and they left off building the city. Therefore its name was called Babel, because there the LORD confused the language of all the earth. And from there the LORD dispersed them over the face of all the earth. (ESV)
]. It is far more reasonable to accept the Biblical claim that God created all of mankind’s different languages; than it is to believe that some space-dust from a massive chaotic explosion somehow became life, and then took on intelligence, and then from the same evolutionary process ended up with 7,000 different languages. That makes no sense at all.

Oh stop it! You’re making my sides hurt! Please tell me again how reasonable it is that every human being on earth had a powwow in a valley somewhere, decided to build a really tall brick building so they could go up to heaven,  be famous, and to stay neighbors.

Explain to me how sensible it is that a spirit-man in the sky literally visited to check on their work and got really pissed off that they showed some bricklaying skills. He then decided to keep them from being successful and unified, so he used telekinesis to lift them up, plop them down in other parts of the earth, and then magically changed their languages so they wouldn’t be able to understand one another (or themselves, I imagine). Talk about anti-progress, a bitchy boss, and a serious case of “go sit in the corner and be quiet”.

Oh yeah, that makes a whole lot more sense than gradual change over time.

Read more wtf-i-tude at jesus-is-savior.com.

Tags: bible, christianity, creationism, evolution, fstdt, fundamentalists