Posts Tagged marriage

California’s Proposition 8 Ruled Unconstitutional!

It’s all over the news! It’s confirmed! California’s Proposition 8 has been ruled unconstitutional, violating both the Due Process and Equal Protection Clauses of the Fourteenth Amendment.

Read the entire decision document here:

Prop 8 Ruling (it will pop up, and you can expand it)

This is a tremendous victory for gay rights!

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Do You Participate When You Don’t Believe?

I was recently a bridesmaid in a wedding–bouquet and all. It was a gorgeous event, and I had a wonderful time celebrating my childhood best friend’s marriage to her new husband. Standing up with her was a youthful dream come true.

The wedding mass was held in an old, opulent Roman Catholic church where the bride is a member. I didn’t mind this despite my divorce from Christianity and personal views on the way the Roman Catholic Church (RCC) manages itself. It was a beautiful location for their special moment.

Photo by photine

During rehearsal we ran through the ceremonial procedures and were instructed how to act by the wedding sacristan and the priest. At one point, the priest walked over to where we bridesmaids were sitting and gave us all a stern look. “When you are walking up the aisle,” he said, “Once you reach the front you must stop, pause, and bow to the Eucharist. You can’t genuflect in your dresses, but you must bow.”

At this matter-of-fact instruction, he walked away. Immediately, my eyebrows shot up. Surely he didn’t expect us all to be Catholic. and what non-Catholic would bow to a piece of food in a gold box on the stage?

My feeling of puzzled reticence only inflated when the priest joined us once again ten minutes later. He instructed us how to “properly receive the Eucharist” during communion: All of us must go up together because it would (apparently) look better. Those people not in good standing with the RCC should cross their hands over their chest (like a dead person in a coffin) and receive a blessing in the form of a cross drawn on the forehead by the priest’s thumb.

I sighed audibly, rolled my eyes, but kept my vocal opinions on this instruction to myself. The bridesmaid beside me was clearly perturbed as she scoffed, “Geez, who wouldn’t want a blessing?” I guess I didn’t hide my distaste for these traditions very well.

Some of the other other bridesmaids knew I wasn’t a Christian, but all of them knew I wasn’t Catholic. I saw a few  eyes dart towards me from further down the pew as I pondered what to do.

First we’re told to bow to someone who isn’t there. Then we’re told to receive a blessing and get a torture device religious symbol drawn on our foreheads? I mean really–what kind of atheist would I be if I didn’t feel a bit annoyed by this?

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Lesbian and Gay Strangers Get a Marriage License

New York residents Kitty Lambert and her partner Cheryl wanted to get married, so they went to the Clerk’s office and asked for a marriage license. A group of people also went with them to protest the state’s recent defeat of a bill that would grant gays and lesbians the right to marry.

With news cameras rolling, Kitty then turned to the crowd and asked for any male who would be willing to get married to her. A gay man named Ed stepped forward and volunteered.

Kitty’s point in approaching the City Clerk for a marriage license is that there is no religious basis for marriage, and it serves only as a legally binding contract in our society. Instead of being offered the ability to receive a license with her long-term partner, she was able to secure a license with a virtual stranger, strictly based on their gender. (source)

Kitty and Ed say they will not actually marry until they are allowed to with the people they truly love (and actually know). Because it should be about commitment and partnership, not gender. Brava, Kitty!

Check out the Buffalo, NY news coverage for more shots of this moment.

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When Sex is “Gross”

She scoffed at every kiss, every sweet show of closeness and intimacy on screen. Exclamations of disgust drooled out the corners of her mouth as if she forgot to swallow a bite of food. Sexuality was shocking, and even a hint of it was met with “Ugh, why did they have to show that?” and “It was a great scene until that happened.” I stewed in my seat, sometimes replying with simple explanations why love is beautiful and married people showing affection is wonderful and normal. She would have none of it.

I’m shocked by how sheltered and closed-off some of my friends are to the real world. Was I ever so afraid of honest, sweet intimacy that I would jeer and shy away at the most innocent hint of it in a PG-13 movie? Yes, I’m sure I was. But why? Why is healthy, loving sexuality a taboo? I can’t answer this, but it bothers me.

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