I'm considering a 'terrible t-shirts' post one day. Isn't this classy? And gross?
I should not own three laundry baskets, but all those clothes have to go somewhere! One is dedicated to dirty laundry, but two entire baskets were stuffed with crumpled up linens and old shirts and sweaters. After I moved from my old apartment, the “should be sorted sometime” collection had nowhere to hide. I kept staring at it when I grabbed my outfit for the day out of my closet. My inability to purge a simple clump of clothing nagged the back of my mind. Maybe I really am that lazy. The fact that I’m sneezing right now from the musty smell is my admission of guilt.
Some of the clothing can be washed and salvaged for future rotation, but I’m ashamed to say my dig through the baskets tonight was like extracting core samples from the depths of earth’s history. The further I dove, the older my memories associated with each piece of clothing.
So to share a bit of my life with you, here is my list of tops I’m throwing away tonight:
Third Day “Truth Gomer” (2001): The fans of the Christian band Third Day call themselves Gomers, after a song and woman in the Bible. Gomer became a last name of sorts, and each Gomer registered a first name to go along with it. After you registered, they sent you a bright orange t-shirt with “Property of ____ Gomer” on the front. You took a permanent marker and wore your Gomer name in the blank space. My name was Truth Gomer because my ideal in life was to always tell the truth and seek the Truth as much as possible. Look where that search landed me? 
Gospel Choir (2001): My alma mater had a black gospel choir, and I sang alto and tenor (hell yeah I said tenor). It was some of the most fun I had in college. For concerts on campus, we wore bright, bold t-shirts with bold words like “GRACE”, “FAITH”, and “SOUL” emblazoned on the front. I cut my yellow one off at the bottom because I was “edgy” and it was too tight around my hips. Apparently t-shirt dresses were in style and nobody knew it.
Hard Rock Cafe: Memphis (2002): I went on a mission trip to Memphis, TN in 2002 for my spring break. We traveled for Jesus, not for booze! We helped some families with manual labor and went witnessing in the poor parts of the city. I used to collect Hard Rock Cafe t-shirts from every city I visited. This shirt was especially cool because it had a puffy, sparkling flaming electric guitar on the back. I wore it everywhere! Want to know what my strongest memory is from that trip? The splinter-shedding bunk beds and how my tonsils swelled up so large that everyone felt the need to comment on how loudly I snored. Snoring for Jesus, I guess…
The shirt I ruined while having sex on the laundry room floor (2007): Well, not the actual top, but its twin. I bought the yellow blouse specifically for the date I was on; I loved that silly shirt (best boob day ever). Perhaps as a result of this wonderful boob day, my over-zealous (ex-)boytoy ruined it in a smear of detergent. I purchased another one to replace it, and made sure that it didn’t get any similar stains. Hey Mom, I hope you’re not reading this!
I am ecstatic about moving on from the person I was during each of those periods of my life. Nostalgia is amusing and sweet, but I’m done. Good memories, all of them. But good riddance all the same!
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